One of the most powerful emotions a person can experience in life is grief. It is often so intensely felt because usually we have little control over it, or what caused it.
Grief occurs as the result of a loss. Although the five stages of grief written by psychiatrist Elizabeth Kubler Ross were meant to help people come to terms with loss, they are general concepts (denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance) that can apply to a variety of losses—from job loss to divorce to death. While grieving is a deeply personal experience that is felt very differently from person to person, there are healthy ways to cope with loss, regardless of what symptoms of grief you’re experiencing.
Research shows that keeping a journal during a time of mourning can help people process what they are feeling and ultimately cope with their loss. Continue reading for a few grief journaling tips and prompts to get you started.
Grief isn’t something that only affects us emotionally. It can also take a physical toll that can manifest into insomnia, panic attacks, nausea, headaches, increased blood pressure, lethargy and depression. Keeping your feelings bottled up can contribute to the physical symptoms you’re feeling.
Grief journaling can help by offering opportunities to:
There are no rules when keeping a grief journal—consider it a safe and judgment-free place to express what’s on your mind. Some days you may not feel like writing, and other days the words will pour out. Your journal can take any form—from a spiral bound notebook for handwritten thoughts, to a digital version on your computer or an app on your phone.
If the thought of starting from scratch is overwhelming, grief journals like I Remember You: A Grief Journal, are also available for purchase and can help get you started. Decide if you want to journal daily or weekly, and have a designated space (table, desk, comfy chair) to help you stay focused and minimize distractions.
Organize your journal however you see fit. You may want to include sections for free journaling to write about how you are feeling on a given day, pages for quotes or inspirational sayings, a space for doodling or artwork, and a section devoted to writing prompts. Sometimes the hardest part is not knowing what to say.
Writing prompts can be a helpful way to structure your thoughts. Here are three examples:
1. Provide yourself answers to open ended questions.
2. What is something that makes you feel better when you’re having a hard day?
3. How has your life changed since the person passed?
Learning to live a new normal is a process. Keeping a journal can help you reflect on where you’ve been and how far you’ve come in your journey, especially when you go back and re-read it after some time has passed. A journal can be a complement to other forms of grief support like counseling and support groups.
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